It’s Not a Fork.

One of the more common urgent calls I get from a mentee is when they are considering making a move.

Sometimes, I get the call when they are considering applying.

Other times, it’s when they have an offer in hand.

For those that do not yet have an offer and are considering applying, there will be another blog post for you.

But for those that already have an offer in hand, the perspective that I want to offer you is this:

It is not a fork in the road.

Please don’t get me wrong.

I don’t take your anxiousness lightly.

Of course, career decisions should be made logically and carefully.

At the same time, know that some of the pressure you put on this single decision can be self-imposed, and dare I say it, made-up?

And I can say that with confidence because I distinctly remember how much angst I had when I was interviewing for the job I have now. I was in BigLaw – and the idea of leaving it all behind for in-house life, the year I was up for shareholder, after all the hard work I put into building a small book of business and my reputation, was ulcer-inducing and sleep-depriving.

Beyond the “what-ifs”– and catastrophic scenario after catastrophic scenario (whether realistic or not) playing on loop in my mind — was the fact that I bought into the lie that the decision was some cosmic fork in the road, such that there were no points of return.

For whatever reason, I was approaching it like a Choose Your Own Adventure book, with no backsies. (I may be dating myself with this book series reference).

When did the decision to change jobs elevate to the commitment of marriage or a life sentence?

In reality, if you are a good lawyer with decent skills and work ethic and you end up in a job you don’t like, you are most likely able to find another one (if the economy is strong). This is even easier if you have a strong network.

And if you move from firm to in-house (and did so without burning bridges) and you don’t like the in-house job, it’s likely that the firm will take you back or you can join another firm — or you can always apply for another in-house job (because it’s easier to move to an in-house job if you are already in-house).

Yes, I am speaking in generalities, but my point is that when you take away the finality of decisions that aren’t really final — when you realize that it’s not a fork in the road and that you can own your career path and blaze your own trails, the decision isn’t as daunting.

While I agree that the grass isn’t always greener and you should be careful “jumping” around from opportunity to opportunity without discernment, I submit to you that you won’t ever know unless you try and are willing to make a mistake but grow in the process.

At the end of the day, it is up to you and your risk profile and your why.

Some additional tips:

• Assess your why and use it as your measuring stick.
  • What is important to you and what isn’t? What is non-negotiable vs. negotiable? For example, as a working mom, flexibility is more important to me than income.
• Compare what you have to what you might be getting into.
  • What do you love/like/hate about your current position? What do you expect to get with the new gig? Is it better?
• Don’t underestimate the power of the trusty pro / con list.
• Write out worst case scenarios. Then come up with a backup plan. And assess probabilities (instead of possibilities).

Of course, you can always call a mentor.